Saturday, June 19, 2010

Contradictions Get Me Everything I Want

It’s no secret that I get bored very easily. Even in simple conversations, I bounce around from topic to topic. My mind is always racing. I am always in search of fun and excitement. I can’t sit still for very long, I like to be busy. I’ve had more “life plans” than I can count. These plans are always changing. Some people may call it unstable or crazy, but I think it is a simple matter of having no idea what I want.

While I take this approach to life unabashedly (as I see nothing wrong with “keeping things interesting”) but I am aware that my running around in circles can make those around me feel dizzy. Those who “try to figure me out” are sorely out of luck, since I’ve yet to figure myself out. I never know my next move, I improvise as I go along.

I think most people would agree that, at times, I am a walking contradiction. I am all or nothing, never really knowing how to find the middle ground. My life is either a frenzy rushing from a work 12-hour work day to dinner with friends OR taking the easy road, not really working hard and retreating into my own space in my “free time”

I find that the more I work, the harder I work at my social life as well. As much as I cherish and love my “Alice-time” as my friends from home call it, I am a social creature by nature. I like to be around people and the idea that I’m achieving healthy work-life balance.

These days, I’m a workaholic. This happens every once in a while. I become consumed with work and let it take over my life. I take on many projects and am always rushing from one place to another. I’ve noticed that this usually coincides with a sense of loss or extreme boredom. When I don’t know what to do with myself, the obvious choice seems to be throwing myself into my “career”

So that’s where I am right now. I am in the mindset of working hard, getting things done, creating new fantastic life plans and being completely exhausted. =)

(My) Songs of the week
1. Muse-Time is Running Out
2. Smashing Pumpkins-Perfect
3. My favorite highway-bad habits
4. Jay z-On To The Next One
5. Tom Petty-You Don't Know It It Feels
and the new Eminem album

PS-Happy Early Birthday to The Only Living Girl in Paris aka my friend Francesca (she has a great blog as well)

2 comments:

  1. Love this post! I feel the same way sometimes! Thanks for sharing alice!! :)

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  2. Glad you agreed with the perspective.
    Boredom is the best drive ever.

    ReplyDelete